Twenty Twelve

Well it's still the new year (sort of - just 11 days old) so don't think it's too late to take a look back at my 2012.

While 2011 was the extraordinary year of conceiving and labouring in love before bringing Julianne into our world, 2012 was a year of embracing motherhood and all the sleepless nights, anxiousness, worries, laughter, joy, pride and love that came along with it.

2012 was certainty no walk in the park.  I struggled coping with Julianne's reflux especially during the months of February and March when she refused the bottle and would only nurse when she was sleepy or half asleep.  It was the single most stressful period of 2012.  Then April came and I was forced to deal with mummy guilt when I left her behind in the wonderful care of my mum and returned to work.  I remember spending Day 1 back at work weeping in the nursing  room missing my daughter so badly (sounds silly now that I think about it after being back at work for a good 8 months).  In between January and December, there were of course those sleepless nights when she was unwell, teething or going through some major development and as a result - fussy and needy - believing that since she can't sleep, then no one else in the room should be either.

Circa CNY 2012 - the peak of her reflux

In August, I also lost my grandfather to an infection that proved too strong for his 89 year old body.  His passing was sudden by my standards.  When my uncle passed on 12 New Year's eve ago, I saw him bravely fight his cancer relapse for 6 months before God called him Home.  In 2010, I saw Ah Ma growing more and more frail by the months as her kidney functions slowed down with each visit we paid her.  Yeye was different - he was 89.  Driving to work everyday, enjoying his shabu shabu beef, sushi and teochew porridge and travelling around the world - from Tibet to the Antartic.  His mind, lucid and alert enough to run the family business even at this age.  I always believed he had many more good years ahead of him but God had other plans.

So glad that at least Jules gotta see her great-grandfather ....
and made him smile just before he went for his operation

Thankfully, there were more things to cheer about in 2012 than there were painful memories.  In February, I welcomed my little nephew Ry into this world.  Today he's a chubby little munchkin and turing one soon!

Little Ry joins the gang

Then in July, I welcomed my sister and her family home after having them away in the States for 9 years!  That has got to be one of the highlights of the year.  I'm glad she's home to see Jules grow up, I'm glad she home for me to see Sophie grow up.

Home at last!

Throughout the year, there were of course those amazing Julianne-growing-up moments that words alone can't quite explain why they made up the sunshine and rainbows of my 2012.  All the joy and mummy-pride overflowing whenever she hit a developmental milestone - like when she first called "Mama" in May and when she took her first step in October.  Not forgetting all the laughter she brought to the home with her hilarious dance moves or stand-up monologue that she performs in front of her miserable 6 die-heart fans at home.

My little sunshine!!

2012 had its challenges but by the grace of God, I overcame them.  Humbled, polished and refined along the way.  2012 also had its many great moments - those that you wish time just stood still.  

I'm all ready to take on 2013 and all that it will bring.  I of course hope happy days will out number the stormy ones and pray that in both circumstances, I just never forget to be thankful for His grace, mercy, strength and love that brings me through year after year no matter what the circumstances may be.

I hope everyone's off to a fabulous 2013 and may the rest of your year with sprinkled with lots of blessings and love all round!